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Today is her birthday. Birthdays aren't usually anything special in 12 and, if it's turning 12, it's usually something to dread. The only birthday Katniss has ever cared about was 19 and she's not there yet. Instead, she's turning 18 today and if nothing had ever changed, she would be lining up for the Reaping for her last time this year. She'd have so many names in the ball that she'd be bound to be picked but Katniss likes to think she'd be lucky. After all, she made it to sixteen without ever getting Reaped, didn't she?

It had been Prim who was Reaped that year, Prim who only had one name in the ball and had the best shot out of any kid in the Seam to never get Reaped. Prim, for whom Katniss had sacrificed everything.

On her birthday, Katniss always thinks of Prim. She thinks about how Prim always made it a point to give her something on her birthday even if she didn't have the resources that Katniss had. Somehow magically, there was good flint for starting fires or a little tinder box. Her boots got patched or there was good, pliable wood for new arrows. Prim always managed to make something out of nothing.

Today, so she doesn't think about Prim, Katniss decides to work. She's taking orders in the dining room, bussing tables, working back in the kitchen. Anything to keep her hands and mind busy so that homesickness doesn't threaten to eat her from the inside out. It's always been the mental things she's struggled with. She can deal with pain, hunger, death but she never, ever has been able to deal with thinking about just how much she misses her sister each and every day.

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He averts his eyes somewhat when she dips under the water because it is clear. He smiles though, his gaze going back to her when she comes out of the water and for a moment, he's stunned. She is so beautiful that it's hard for him to think about anything except how pretty she is.

His eyebrows go up and for a moment, he has to think about her words. "Uhm...yeah. I guess...if you want." He looks a little sheepish. "I've never had my hair washed. Not since I was a little boy, I mean."

"They let you wash your own hair in prep? Ugh, men have it easy," Katniss says, rolling her eyes. It's more at the Capitol than Peeta because honestly he had no choice in the matter just like she had none herself. Nobody ever chooses to be a tribute except careers and it's well-established they're crazy. Enobaria filed her teeth, after all.

"I just want to touch you, Peeta. Is that okay?"

Peeta chuckles a little at that. "To be fair, I don't have nearly as much to wash as you do." He had been picked over and mucked with from the moment he'd stepped out of the shower and he'd learned after the first shower to scrub himself until his skin was raw or Portia would end up in the shower with him, scouring his skin.

At her request, his breath catches and he nods, his voice going soft. "Of course. You never have to ask, Katniss."

"I've never had this much time to myself. I've always been too busy hunting or working or having to do something for the Games," Katniss says. She thinks that Peeta can understand it. Before he was reaped, he'd worked in the bakery with his family and spent long hours there.

Katniss works the soap into a lather and slides her hands into his hair, massaging his scalp with nails that are slightly longer now that she isn't doing grubby work with them all day long. She can afford to have a few luxuries about her appearance and the nails are one of them.

He nods because he does understand it. Since he can remember he's been up before dawn to help out at the bakery before going to school. He'd gone back to help in the bakery after school and any free time he'd had had been very limited. "It's a lot to get used to."

He closes his eyes, tilting his head forward in a motion that is absolute relaxation, his entire body softening and relaxing under her touch. He breathes out an almost groan at how good it feels to have her hands in his hair, nails scrubbing lightly at his scalp.

"That feels amazing."

"Good thing we never mentioned this in the Capitol. They would have had four people taking showers with us for sure," Katniss scoffs. She slides her hands down to his shoulders and squeezes them lightly.

"I don't want anyone else to know about this place. Nobody. Not even Finnick, Annie and Johanna. I want it to be just ours."

"I'd rather just stick with one." He blushes fairly pink when he says that simply because now he's thinking about taking a shower with Katniss because obviously he meant 'just one other person' as opposed to a one person shower.

He clears his throat and looks up at her, hair still soapy. Her words bring him back to a more serious place. He shakes his head at that. "No. I mean, yes. Me too. I don't want to share this place with anyone but you."

He holds up a finger in a 'one moment' sort of gestures and takes a step back so he can submerge himself under water, coming up once the soap has had a chance to clear his hair, slicking it back.

"Good. Just ours," Katniss says. She shifts to float on her back and looks up at the canopy of trees, watching as the sunlight dapples through the leaves.

"I hope it's always spring or summer in this door. I don't want winter when it's too cold to do this."

He nods in silent agreement. He can see far more of Katniss' body this way when she floats on her back and he tries not to stare.

"I'm not sure time passes in the doors. I haven't thought about it honestly."

His eyes slide over her body again then back to her eyes. "Can you teach me how to do that? How to float?"

At least it'd get his mind off their nakedness.

"Oh, sure. It's just a matter of spreading out your body weight evenly," Katniss says, showing him the way she had stretched out her arms and legs. "And you have to completely relax. Give it a try and if it doesn't work, I'll show you the way my dad showed me when I was younger."

It's with some trepidation that he tries to follow her lead. Unfortunately, for a boy who hasn't spent much time in the water relaxing completely is a bit difficult. He sinks under the water, coming up with his feet under him sputtering a little.

"Yeah, I think you're going to have to treat me like a little kid," he tells her sheepishly.

Katniss laughs and wades over. She spreads her arms out over the water.

"Let my arms support you? I'll teach you how to spread your weight."

He takes a deep breath. "Okay."

He gives it another shot, attempting to relax while his feet aren't on the ground. It is easier to relax when he knows Katniss is going to support his weight in the water, to keep him from going under.

Katniss spreads her hands beneath him to hold him up. "See how it feels? Now just imagine there's an invisible board holding you up the whole time, forcing you to be on top of the water."

He struggles a little, but after a few seconds he manages to do a half way decent job of floating. He's not sinking at least. A grin spreads across his face.

"Like this?"

"Just like that," Katniss says, laughing as she eases her hands from under him. She doesn't know how long it will take Peeta to notice he's doing it on his own but she isn't going to call attention to it.

"I kind of take for granted the fact that my father used to bring us through the hole in the fence. I don't think anyone else in 12 has ever had a chance to really swim, right?"

He's doing okay, a little to cautious to really relax, but managing it. However, when she asks her question, it's too much to hold a conversation and float at the same time. He sinks, but doesn't panic this time, doesn't flail, just puts his feet under himself before he goes under. He laughs at himself and slicks his hands back over his hair.

"Not as far as I know. I think you and Prim are the only ones. Most of 12 isn't brave enough to go through the fence." He gives her an admiring look.

"I'm brave enough to do anything that's necessary but I wouldn't necessarily think of myself as brave. More like...reckless and unwilling to bend to authority," Katniss says thoughtfully.

"I just like to fight."

He chuckles a little at that. "You never do see yourself the way others see you, but I'd agree with the bit about authority," he winks at her.

"Do you get bored here? With so much freedom and so little reason to fight."

"Not really," Katniss says. "I would much rather have peace and freedom than get a chance to bash someone's brains in. As much as I like to fight, I like peace even more than that."

He nods a little at that. "That sounds like the girl I know instead of the girl on fire that everyone else knows."

And he likes that, that he knows a different Katniss than the rest of the world does.

Katniss snorts. "Don't tell anyone. They'll think I'm a pushover, Peeta, and we can't let that happen." It's mostly teasing but she has a real point about not wanting her soft side exposed. If this is a trick by the Capitol, it's a weakness that could be easily exploited.

He's still grinning when he speaks, but his voice is more serious. "Your secrets are always safe with me, Katniss."

He reaches out to run his thumb across the water slick skin of her shoulder, biting his bottom lip slightly as he does. The idea of being allowed to initiate a touch like this with her is still new enough that he's a little hesitant and still very much in awe with it.

"Good. I'll keep your secrets too," she promises. Indulging Peeta is something new for her and she likes the way it feels with him with it's just them alone.

"This is a pretty good secret, I think."

"I know you will." Though, he doesn't have many secrets left and those that he does, he's not sure even Katniss knows. In a surprising turn of events, if Peeta could make it always be just them, he would. He smiles at that, nodding.

"It's the best secret I've ever had." Which would have formerly gone to the 'I'm in love with the girl on fire', but since this involved actually getting to be with the girl on fire, it trumps that one.