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Today is her birthday. Birthdays aren't usually anything special in 12 and, if it's turning 12, it's usually something to dread. The only birthday Katniss has ever cared about was 19 and she's not there yet. Instead, she's turning 18 today and if nothing had ever changed, she would be lining up for the Reaping for her last time this year. She'd have so many names in the ball that she'd be bound to be picked but Katniss likes to think she'd be lucky. After all, she made it to sixteen without ever getting Reaped, didn't she?

It had been Prim who was Reaped that year, Prim who only had one name in the ball and had the best shot out of any kid in the Seam to never get Reaped. Prim, for whom Katniss had sacrificed everything.

On her birthday, Katniss always thinks of Prim. She thinks about how Prim always made it a point to give her something on her birthday even if she didn't have the resources that Katniss had. Somehow magically, there was good flint for starting fires or a little tinder box. Her boots got patched or there was good, pliable wood for new arrows. Prim always managed to make something out of nothing.

Today, so she doesn't think about Prim, Katniss decides to work. She's taking orders in the dining room, bussing tables, working back in the kitchen. Anything to keep her hands and mind busy so that homesickness doesn't threaten to eat her from the inside out. It's always been the mental things she's struggled with. She can deal with pain, hunger, death but she never, ever has been able to deal with thinking about just how much she misses her sister each and every day.

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"Harmless, maybe, but annoying," Johanna says, because the constant presence would send Johanna to the nearest sharp item that she can find. There's a reason that her own accompaniment tends to leave her alone and it's not because she asked nicely. "She hit gold with you two, though. Haymitch and the first dual victors? She was probably in raptures."

"Probably, but I like to think Effie actually likes us deep down beneath the makeup," Katniss says. She believes so, anyway, even if Effie is hardly rebel material. She just sticks with what she knows.

"Well, Peeta anyway."

Johanna doesn't think her stylist likes her at all. She's rough around the edges and likes murder the way that no girl from Seven is really supposed to be. Maybe if she'd been a career, it would've been different, but it's not like it matters anymore. "Does she still wear those awful glittering monstrosities, even here?"

"Yeah. Not quite as bad," Katniss concedes, "But she sure tries to make up for the lack of Capitol Couture around here. It's kind of frightening. Me personally, I'm glad nobody's trying to eliminate every scrap of my body hair."

Johanna lets her gaze slip over Katniss, as if assessing for herself, but it's not like there are any cameras to impress and Katniss doesn't have the same habit as stripping down naked as she and some of the other victors don't mind so much. "They don't really mind the hair in 12, do they?" she deadpans, tearing into another of Peeta's rolls.

"We've got other concerns. You know, like feeding our families and not getting blown to smithereens," Katniss deadpans back. "Somehow having a little extra body hair isn't that big a deal. Besides, the winters are cold."

Katniss is always so passionate and determined and, frankly, Johanna enjoys poking at her to see if she'll break. It's a happy thing, being able to test and test to that degree. "You don't need to worry about that anymore," she points out. "You're in the lap of luxury, now."

"Maybe. But what if they find us, you know? I still live a little on edge."

Katniss doesn't think she'll ever truly relax anymore, not since the Arena. Maybe she did every once in a while when she thought she would never have to go back in but the Quarter Quell dispelled that particular illusion.

"If they find us, I've been storing up weapons and they're going to understand that just because we're in a nice place, I haven't lost my edge the same as I'm sure your aim hasn't faltered a single day since you got here," Johanna says, sure of that. She folds her napkin in her lap. "Besides, we're growing in number. That means something."

"Yeah. I'm just as dangerous now as I would be then. Probably more dangerous, I actually have enough to eat here and I'm not stressed about going back into the Arena," Katniss says. A full belly is a dangerous weapon and a reason that the Careers almost always do better than tributes from other districts.

"Nobody else I've met seems to know about the Games, though. Why do you think that is?"

"Luck?" Johanna suggests deadly serious, given that she doesn't exactly think that other people should be so lucky to avoid it, but they're also lucky to have never seen a thing like the Games in their life. "Who knows? Maybe it's just not their turn yet? Maybe Panem is in their future?"

"Maybe they're from places that don't have them at all," Katniss proposes. It's a little radical but so is showing up in a place outside the long arm of the Capitol too.

"Maybe there's safe havens beyond all the doors."