"The best term you could give me is...well, professional surfer without the professional title," he clarifies. "What you could say is that I'm an all-around sort of consultant in the ways of personal enjoyment." It's a nice way to say that he sits around Mike's bar, sleeps there when he can, and enjoys other people's cooking, homes, and their alcohol as much as he can get away with.

True, he's a full-time oracle, but that's not something you put on a business card. "I barely remember school," Olaf confesses. "I don't think I paid much attention."